Instagram Best Nine 2016
2016 was a hurricane. It went by so quickly but it was rough and destructive. I went through a lot with my career and my relationship with the people I love was tested. On the upside, I no longer miss being a student and I now (by some miracle) like working, got more financially stable, reunited with old friends, and most importantly, I got to travel~ one international and three local trips this year. The more places I see, the more I indulge in the beauty of life. There are so many evils in this world that it takes a toll on me but in 2016 I realized that oftentimes, all it takes to lose that tightness in my chest is to see God's creations and a breath of fresh air to make me want to live rather than just exist.
The most challenging part of 2016 was getting lost in pursuit of a good career. At the beginning of the year, I left my job as an HR Assistant for an insurance company. I knew I was in the right industry. While fashion and retail piqued the interest of most women (no denying how glamorous it is to be in that industry), I found meaning in being an advocate of financial literacy, in preparing for the most inevitable things on this planet. Retirement. Illness. Death. All my life I've been searching for something to do that will make a significant impact to the lives of others, no matter how little or inconsequential. You know, the dream of leaving the world a bit better than when you entered it? So I took a risky leap of becoming a part-time Financial Advisor in another insurance company. Since it would be a conflict of interest if I kept my HR job, I had to weigh things and it was the toughest decision I had to make. Being in HR was my comfort zone and also, my boyfriend was my teammate. I was living a teenager's dream of spending at least 9 hours a day with her crush. 16-year old, convent school-bred Maye would have jumped for joy and stuck to status quo, but 23-year old Maye knew better. As much as I love spending time with my boyfriend, I knew I had life decisions to make. As time ensued, the business-minded woman in me made me realize that I hated my job. I did not like how I had to face applicants everyday who made it so obvious that I was only talking to facades, to people aiming to please their interviewer that they portray a version of themselves thinking it would score them a passing mark. I found myself yearning for real conversations with real people. More importantly, I was only seeing remote, not direct results of all my hard work. I worked hard to make sure the management had optimal headcount and the employees were happy and well-engaged, but there was no quantifying how much I contributed to the company. Right side of my brain aside, I was looking for my value in numbers. How much did I add to the company's gross annual income? It's noble to be in HR, but it was not for me. It was never for me. So I resigned with plans to put up a small business and take up the licensure exam for insurance agents. The insurance part, I got right. The dream business was a flop. Actually, I never started it. My excitement after getting toppled over the borders of my comfort zone went a little too far. My dad offered to loan me capital but as foolish as this may sound, I forgot that I had no business plan, not even products or services in mind and no people to work with. I had nothing to start with.
I parked my business dream but paving way for sales was a no ragrets move. But it was a part-time job and no sooner did I crawl back into my hole of misery. With a lot of time in my hands, my depression crept back in and I felt lost. My mind was not built to be immobile. I did not go back to my doctor. I made a decision to refuse to live on anti-depressants because of a genetic disorder. Instead I exercised, ate healthy, prayed and sought ways to occupy my mind.
With the help of His amazing grace, I got a full-time job as a Corporate Account Officer in the HMO industry mid-2016. It was wack. Culture shock was an understatement. I sat there on my first week not knowing I was the butt of gossips. I used to work in offices where a beige dress paired with a white coat and nude stilettos ensemble was the norm. Apparently, I was dressed too nicely for this new office and allegedly had an air of confidence and condescending demeanor that was not easily accepted. I was stalked online, my posts were sent around in screenshots and scrutinized. These were not the kind of people I'm accustomed to. But I chose the high road and nobody heard a word from me. I gained real friends there eventually, and for six months I found an adequate support system in them to realize that I like my job. I felt genuine happiness that I never felt when I was in HR. I finally have a job that requires me to go out of the office to visit clients that I need not to be confined behind my desk. I conduct benefit orientations so it gave me an opportunity to practice public speaking. I was put in a position where my decisions could be worth six digits. And I need to retain 95% of my corporate clients lest the company's income would be severely damaged - at last I could quantify my output. I could finally see how vital my job was. I know that because I no longer feel like I'm dragging myself to work every Monday morning. And now I'm thankful that I focused on the work itself rather than the people who tried to bring me down.
It's in 2016 that I can truly say the tables have turned and I have finally grown up. Thank you, Lord for letting me finish strong. I'm ready to start over again.
No comments
Post a Comment