The year that was

It's the first day of 2014 and I guess this would be my obligatory A Memoir for 2013 post. 

2013 was not my year. In fact, no year was since I became an adult and started taking this quarterlife crisis seriously. But it was definitely the year with the most number of firsts and the year in which I was obliged to step out of my comfort zone several times. 

In February, I got my first job. It was my first time in the real world, outside the walls of DLSU. Surprisingly, I felt that I was in place. I was quite hesitant about the nature of work though, since it was not related to my course. I was just enticed by the thought of being in the banking industry, however on a contractual basis. In the end, I could honestly say that was the best five months of my adult life so far. I met really wonderful people in just one place that it was painful to leave. It was then until the middle of the year when everything fell into place. New set of friends, new found love. God gave me more than an answered prayer.

When the year started, I weighed about a few sets of plastic barbels because of heartache. I suffered from depression and in just two weeks I receded like a once inflated balloon. But with the help of my family and new people in my life, I found that wounds never stay fresh, they heal. I guess 2013 was also the year of letting go for me. I had a hard time accepting goodbyes, since I was never really good at it. I was always known to have disturbing separation anxiety, which is probably why I'm still bitter about my first job and haven't moved on to the point of missing certain people while on the brink of tears. 2013 was just the year of burning bridges and breaking walls and letting new people in.

Towards the end of the year it became quite monotonous. As evident as my rants, I am not very passionate about my current job and it somehow affected my lifestyle (and temper). But I sought guidance and in December I became a member of the SFC as influenced by my "GG" (God's Gift) as they call it. I felt relieved to be part of another community, to have another family whom I can always turn to when life is taking its toll on me.

I can say that you can never really claim a year as yours like how every other being does on every 31st of December. It occurred to me that no one ever really has a smooth-sailing year, like being born in the year of the horse would make the universe indebted to you for 365 days. You may have more great experiences than bad, but you will also have disappointments. So this year (as tempted as I am to promise that I will have skinny limbs), I will make no promises, no claiming that this year will be better than the others, and just do my best as I let the universe run its course.